If I Have to Say It by Frida Kahlo

Today, I’m sharing with you a quote by Frida Kahlo, famous Mexican painter who was born in 1907. This woman was obviously a force of nature, vibrant and larger than life, but also vulnerable and very human. She represents the pain every woman on earth is going through—physical and emotional. Know that not a lot can fathom the anguish of a woman who has been hurt, the depth of her sorrow, the height of her bliss then the descent to the grey plateaus in between. Frida showed that a female’s life is so full yet so empty. But she conquers her passion and needs and meditates herself to a spiritual trance by her paintings and by writing it all down in her diary.

Frida proved how strong a woman can be and how much she can endure in the face of adversity. Even though I empathize with the pain she went through, some because of her physical illness of a broken spine when she was 6 then the pain of constant infidelity from her husband, Diego Rivera. He was her best friend and the first critic of her art, before they married but who was constantly unfaithful to her. He was never her husband or ‘hers’–-as Frida says. He belonged to many women and mostly he belonged to himself only. Frida and Diego were in constant conflict, and she had the passion and talent to paint her pain, about their relationship and also her physical, emotional and spiritual suffering.

She suffered, a lot. Should she have married a narcissistic womanizer? Who knows? Remember she was just the product of her time. She certainly made beauty out of the situation. But I don’t believe two people who constantly hurt one another are necessarily good role models for how one lives life. I’d much, much rather be content in life and not be famous than in constant emotional and physical pain and famous. I’ve been in my share of destructive relationships, and I don’t recommend it, even if great art comes from it. I admire them both in many ways, but they were self-destructive and unhealthy in a lot of ways.

Frida even through all this gives us the hope that we will overcome any calamity we might face. She tells us to laugh, to love hard and mostly to survive no matter what.

And that’s what I wish you. Enjoy your day y’all!

I’m not going to ask you to kiss me
Neither ask for forgiveness when I believe that you have done wrong
or that you have made a mistake.
Nor am I going to ask you to hug me when I need it the most
or to invite me to dinner on our anniversary.
I’m not going to ask you to go around the world
to live new experiences much less
ask you to give me your hand when we are in that city.
I’m not going to ask you to tell me how pretty I’ am
even if it’s a lie or that you write me anything nice.
Nor will I ask you to call me to tell me
how your day was or tell me you miss me.
I’m not going to ask you to thank me for everything I do for you,
for you to worry about me when my moods are down
and of course I will not ask you to support me in my decisions.
I’m not going to ask you to listen to me when I have a thousand
stories to tell you.
I’m not going to ask you to do anything,
not even to stay by my side forever.
Because if I have to ask you
I do not want it anymore.

xoxo